Enneagram 6 and 9 Relationship and Compatibility

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Jesse Williams

Enneagram type 9s are also known as the “keepers of the peace”, while Enneagram type 6s are known as “the dependable” type. What happens when you put these two together in a romantic relationship?

A Taylor Swift song (we mean one of the “happy love story” ones)!

Enneagram types 6 and type 9 are capable of entering and remaining in a beautifully harmonious relationship that’s the stuff of love songs (and most of our fantasies). Read on for an in-depth look at what makes these two types click so well and last so long!

Enneagram 6 and 9 Compatibility

Types 6 and 9 build relationships that are rooted in teamwork, healthy autonomy, and stability.

Type 6s bring energy, loyalty, curiosity, protective instincts, and a constant desire to level up the relationship and their environment. This personality type has a constantly working and vigilant mind, accompanied by adorable playfulness and comforting warmth.

However, type 6s are given to experiencing that dreaded destroyer of relationships—insecurity (even if their insecurity is kind of endearing!). A healthy 9 will help them through this; a needy 9 will feed on this and use it to feel needed.

9s, on the other hand, are non-judgmental, tolerant, and steady lovers of harmony, commitment, and peace. With these traits, 9s are like a balm to the 6’s soul; the calm and groundedness soothes their anxiety and fears of abandonment.

However, there’s a long-running joke that says that if you gave a type nine four options and asked them to choose one as the answer to “how to be in a relationship”, they’d have the hardest time figuring out if it’s never telling their partner how they feel, pushing their partner away to be alone, completely losing oneself in their partner, or avoiding conflict at any cost!

Ultimately, though, healthy 6s and 9s manage to easily find in their relationship that one factor that eludes most others—balance. Despite being so different, both types seek the same thing in a relationship and a partner, building a flourishing relationship on a solid foundation of dependable values, hard work, and complementary differences.

Therefore, it’s completely unsurprising to know that relationships between Enneagram 6s and 9s are among the most common relationships!

Enneagram 6 and 9 Relationship

Now that we know how compatible they are, what does a relationship between type 6 and 9 look like, and is it always smooth sailing?

A relationship between Enneagram types 6 and 9 is pretty conventional—think the poster child for the typical “happy American family” (all the good parts of it—you know what we mean!).

This love story is fueled by a shared desire for security, predictability, and commitment, against the backdrop of a calm lifestyle—one where routine, family, and work occupy a place of pride on the mantel, and risk taking and adventures are designated to the top of the piano, in the best-case scenario (*subtly slips in a “Brooklyn 99” reference*).

However, discord can arise when it’s time to express what’s running through their minds—both types can be stubborn, defensive, and frustratingly clammed up, leading to a stalemate that can go on for days.

Both 6s and 9s can also get carried away by their societal roles. Additionally, as you’ve probably figured by now, both types dislike change and don’t want to rock the domestic boat. Any change needs to be methodical and slow.

The Bottom Line

A healthy type 6 and type relationship is the stuff of dreams for most of our hearts, while it’s a dream come true for the lovebirds.

Both types perfectly complement each other and keep the relationship moving forward. They find solidarity in each other, viewing themselves and their partners as regular, simple people with no special demands.

To adapt Ms. Swift’s famous words—this love isn’t difficult, and it’s definitely real, y’all (*happy tear*)!

Be sure to get your own Enneagram Results

Check out out best free enneagram tests to find out which one you should take!

Hint: For most people, the best test is from Truity.

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Written By Jesse Williams

Jesse has taken a deep dive into how personality effects our daily lives. After taking all the tests under the sun, she enjoys comparing her results with total strangers. It's fun for her.

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